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About Literature / Hobbyist Mary-Ann, [Paul], ~Ember~23/Female/United States Recent Activity
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I travel around the world
Searching for ~you
I think in searching for answers
I accidentally, inadvertently
Found something, ~someone
Worth living for
I don't (really really) like ~you
Because I am forcing myself to.
I really really like ~you because I can't help it.
I couldn't with Sonny, so what the hell makes ~you think I can't with ~you?
Take It To The Limit
Dangerous things are happening with my heart. But this time? This time I don't give a damn.
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2016 update

Okay so I have not written. At all. I want to… Cuz I've found reason to. I'm just. Yeah. So I'm going to recap. In January Sonny off'd himself. I… For better or worse, could not handle it. In any way, at all. February was a big blur. Boyfriend broke up with me. Said he "just thought of me as a friend from the beginning" well my God bastard say that AFTER you ASK ME TO MARRY YOU!!!! Throughout that time, my spiritual sense was heightened. I could feel Sonny's energy. Every time I wanted to cut myself I would feel a hand on my arm or hand and I would hear his voice saying "Don't. You don't want to do this, don't need to do this." Each time, I listen. Once I even felt his father, and I just busted out in tears. Figured out what that was pretty fast: He was upset with Sonny for the way he chose to go. I can fully understand that. March is a blur, as well. I still cut, still felt him. Still had dreams about him. One night I dreamed he knocked me up. It was a false positive, but he was still not pleased. April… I'm talking to one of our friends and I ask him, point-blank, if Sonny is in hell. He said yes. I then get this… idea, in my head: If he's in hell well I'll just go there. I load up my rifle with a bullet that he gave me. I was going to shoot myself on his Birthday, the 25th of April. I messaged his daughter Wendy and told her what I was going to do.  She then messages my sister, who tells my parents, who then sit me down and we talk. I've decided to sell my rifle at the suggestion of my parents. In May I find out something disturbing about Sonny's supposed "suicide". There were two guns. One on the bed and one by his head. Now if it was in fact a suicide why the fucking hell would there be two guns? Unless it wasn't. Unless he was trying to defend himself. I'm not saying I suspect Alex, but… I suspect Alex. Big time. He's way too quiet. He always has his phone on him, so why wouldn't he then? I am going to enact my revenge. I have to. He needs to be taken care of, and I know how to do it. Also, the other night I accidentally called Sonny's phone. It called back. I almost shit myself. Turns out, it's a 50 year old named Kevin. Hm. I've also taken an interest in someone else... Of his name I will not mention...
  • Listening to: The sound of my breathing
  • Reading: Words
  • Watching: The calendar...
  • Playing: With words
  • Eating: Nothing
  • Drinking: Nothing
When/if you first feel a spirit in your home, do *not* immediately think "Oh someone died here, it must be them." Chances are, it's most likely not. In my experience, spirits are not stagnant in one place; they travel. They go with you, but they also go other places as well. When you feel a presence near/around you, that is most likely them. They could be a dear friend, relative, pet, ect.. I have seen my dog who passed away, I have felt my best friend and I've also felt his father. I've also felt/seen a glimpse of my grandfather, but not too much. I've smelled my dearly departed grandmother's cooking. That was a nice surprise. I bet you all think I'm crazy, but what I'm telling you is the truth. I've been experiencing these things since I was about 12-ish. I feel spirits, I can communicate with them, they communicate back. I've told both my parents about all my experiences, and dad said it gave him chillbumps. Mom said it was because I was a preemie. I believe that, but why? Why would a baby who was born early get all these wonderful gifts? I don't consider myself "special" or "different". Some people have premonitions and the ability to see/communicate/hear spirits, others don't. I consider myself a person who is in tune with what God gave her. The people who experience this are extraordinarily lucky. The people who aren't, or that doubt it? They would have to experience everything that I have just wrote of, to fully understand. That, the experience, is a gift in itself.
The Girl With All The Gifts
A bit of an essay of sorts about my life. Working title, maybe.
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I wonder...
Why I have these gifts...
Premonitions...
Communication with the deceased...
Feeling them...
Feeling their presence...
Being able to talk to them...
And them to me...
I wonder...
How did I get so blessed?
:heart:
Gifts
Some things I figure I'd be open about. *Shrugs*
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6. I can't remember this night, lol. I think I slept okay.

7. Woke up at 7:40.
I went back to sleep soon after.
Did some reading today. Gonna try to get finished with it tomorrow.
:)
  • Listening to: The sound of my breathing
  • Reading: Words
  • Watching: The calendar...
  • Playing: With words
  • Eating: Nothing
  • Drinking: Nothing
2016 update

Okay so I have not written. At all. I want to… Cuz I've found reason to. I'm just. Yeah. So I'm going to recap. In January Sonny off'd himself. I… For better or worse, could not handle it. In any way, at all. February was a big blur. Boyfriend broke up with me. Said he "just thought of me as a friend from the beginning" well my God bastard say that AFTER you ASK ME TO MARRY YOU!!!! Throughout that time, my spiritual sense was heightened. I could feel Sonny's energy. Every time I wanted to cut myself I would feel a hand on my arm or hand and I would hear his voice saying "Don't. You don't want to do this, don't need to do this." Each time, I listen. Once I even felt his father, and I just busted out in tears. Figured out what that was pretty fast: He was upset with Sonny for the way he chose to go. I can fully understand that. March is a blur, as well. I still cut, still felt him. Still had dreams about him. One night I dreamed he knocked me up. It was a false positive, but he was still not pleased. April… I'm talking to one of our friends and I ask him, point-blank, if Sonny is in hell. He said yes. I then get this… idea, in my head: If he's in hell well I'll just go there. I load up my rifle with a bullet that he gave me. I was going to shoot myself on his Birthday, the 25th of April. I messaged his daughter Wendy and told her what I was going to do.  She then messages my sister, who tells my parents, who then sit me down and we talk. I've decided to sell my rifle at the suggestion of my parents. In May I find out something disturbing about Sonny's supposed "suicide". There were two guns. One on the bed and one by his head. Now if it was in fact a suicide why the fucking hell would there be two guns? Unless it wasn't. Unless he was trying to defend himself. I'm not saying I suspect Alex, but… I suspect Alex. Big time. He's way too quiet. He always has his phone on him, so why wouldn't he then? I am going to enact my revenge. I have to. He needs to be taken care of, and I know how to do it. Also, the other night I accidentally called Sonny's phone. It called back. I almost shit myself. Turns out, it's a 50 year old named Kevin. Hm. I've also taken an interest in someone else... Of his name I will not mention...
  • Listening to: The sound of my breathing
  • Reading: Words
  • Watching: The calendar...
  • Playing: With words
  • Eating: Nothing
  • Drinking: Nothing

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Mary-Ann, [Paul], ~Ember~
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
Current Residence: LA... For now...
Favorite genre of music: Anything Indie (except Indie Rock), Classic Country, Classical
Favorite photographer: None.
Favorite style of art: Literature :heart:
Music player of choice: iPod touch
Favorite cartoon character: None.
Personal Quote: You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you. - Ray Bradbury

What I'm here on DA to do: Spill my heart, spill my mind, spill my soul to those willing and able to listen. To make friends. To read, and be read. :heart:
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:iconemsoileau:
emsoileau Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2016  Hobbyist Photographer
Who are you?
Reply
:iconpossumfan:
PossumFan Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Name's Madeline. Just noticed you're from Louisiana, what part?!
Reply
:iconemsoileau:
emsoileau Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2016  Hobbyist Photographer
Capital city bb (and no that isn't New Orleans). Lol.
Reply
:iconpossumfan:
PossumFan Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Nice, I'm from North Louisiana.
Reply
(1 Reply)
:icontheflawedone:
TheFlawedOne Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the watch!
Reply
:iconpossumfan:
PossumFan Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome.
Reply
:iconthelunarwriter:
Thelunarwriter Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for the watch :D
Reply
:iconpossumfan:
PossumFan Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome, thanks for the Watch and the Llama!
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:iconsoona15:
soona15 Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2016  Student General Artist
Thank you so very much for the WATCH!! :happybounce: :huggle: :D
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:iconpossumfan:
PossumFan Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
You're so very welcome!!!!^_^
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